sovay | From the dangers behind that thick brick wall

So you may remember that shortly before Christmas, as part of the seasonal outbreak of situation comedy, the microwave blew up. It turned out to have been introduced to the apartment by the previous tenants, not brought by my cousins from Texas, so it was sort of the landlord's responsibility to replace it. It's not that we weren't correctly appreciative and lowered our expectations accordingly when he offered the microwave that another set of tenants no longer had a use for. It was really nice of him not just to leave us to our own devices. Under those circumstances, you know you're not getting a state-of-the-art machine. I just really think we can't be blamed for not realizing in advance that when he said "spare microwave" he meant "combination microwave and by all appearances toaster oven whose user interface is mostly a rotary dial."

To give it credit, for the last three weeks I microwaved mugs of water with it daily and it never caught on fire. I did take to referring to it as the dreadnought. In addition to looking like a component of NORAD, it was the size of the freezer and required purchase of a new extension cord in order to plug in. We were never entirely certain of its capabilities. For obvious reasons, it did not come with a manual.

I spent most of today out of the house on various grocery-related errands. Toward evening, after it had started snowing and I was thinking seriously about how much easier it would be to defrost the hot dogs I had bought from Moody's Delicatessen in a microwave that I trusted not to launch nuclear missiles, I finally made contact with my mother and arranged to take from my parents' storeroom the microwave that

derspatchel and I used at Leonard Street. It is now residing above the refrigerator; it needed some cleaning after having been stored for three months, but behaves in all other ways exactly like a microwave. The hot dogs were an adventure of their own, but that wasn't the appliance's fault. I knew they were the artisanal equivalent of foot-long dogs when I bought them, but I swear they got larger as they cooked.

The dreadnought has been relocated to the disused electronics corner of the apartment.

gaudior is a little sorry that they never got the chance to stumble upon the combination of controls that would have caused it to time-travel.

rushthatspeaks is just thankful that we no longer have to worry about it leaking radiation.

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Yay for not being nuked while nuking ;)

I knew they were the artisanal equivalent of foot-long dogs when I bought them, but I swear they got larger as they cooked.

We were very disappointed when the 'metre long hot dog' promised by a restaurant on La Gomera a few years ago turned out to be two 50cm hot dogs laid end to end. Though even with that restriction they reduced a passing 5yo to dropped-jaw amazement.

two 50cm hot dogs laid end to end. Though even with that restriction they reduced a passing 5yo to dropped-jaw amazement.

It's still a lot of hot dog!

Yeah, the friend who ordered it struggled, even though the dish was simply the hot dogs and some sauces. (And despite him being a walking garbage disposal).

My first microwave was like that, many years a-gone.

My first microwave was like that, many years a-gone.

Do you mind if I ask how many years? I never got around to actually establishing the dreadnought's age.

I think I would have acquired it circa 1986? There's a good chance it wasn't new when I did so, as a lot of my kitchenware at that age was inherited from former owners of the student slum I lived in then.

Our first microwave also had a rotary dial, but it was very, very small. It was made by the Emerson Radio Company. It lasted a very long time, but we were sorry to see it go. It did not, so far as I know, have either toaster-oven or missile-launching capacities.

I'm glad you got to defrost your hot dogs with only the difficulties imposed by the food itself.

P.

Our first microwave also had a rotary dial, but it was very, very small. It was made by the Emerson Radio Company.

That makes a lot of sense.

It did not, so far as I know, have either toaster-oven or missile-launching capacities.

I mean, we couldn't prove it about the nuclear launch codes, but we were concerned.

I'm glad you got to defrost your hot dogs with only the difficulties imposed by the food itself.

Thank you! They were worth it.

That sounds remarkably like the wall of microwaves at the Boston office. They are uniformly enormous and unwieldy and have none of the familiar buttons, and I do tend to think about radiation when I'm in close proximity, but that might just be the effect of an entire wall of glowing, hammering microwaves on my admittedly SF tinged imagination.

Glad to hear you have a sane microwave again.

They are uniformly enormous and unwieldy and have none of the familiar buttons, and I do tend to think about radiation when I'm in close proximity, but that might just be the effect of an entire wall of glowing, hammering microwaves on my admittedly SF tinged imagination.

. . . No, I think that would worry me as well. Anything that can be described as a "wall of microwaves" and isn't a department store display, really.

Glad to hear you have a sane microwave again.

Thank you! It is much smaller, but it has a proven history of just microwaving food.

I'm very grateful that you didn't accidentally take out former Soviet military bases in a misguided attempt to cook hot dogs--your caution is admirable!

The tinker at the NORAD recycling center is also to be commended, but are we sure it used microwaves. Check recent papers for headlines about Area Apartment as Source of Hitherto Unidentified Cosmic Radiation.

... perhaps it can be re-repurposed to heat the place if your ordinary heat supply fails.

I should add that our microwave--which was a wedding present--uses a rotary dial. It takes a long time to do anything other than reheat leftovers.

I'm very grateful that you didn't accidentally take out former Soviet military bases in a misguided attempt to cook hot dogs--your caution is admirable!

Thank you! We try not to reopen the Cold War in this household.

Check recent papers for headlines about Area Apartment as Source of Hitherto Unidentified Cosmic Radiation.

Oh, good point. We may have confused radio astronomers.

I should add that our microwave--which was a wedding present--uses a rotary dial. It takes a long time to do anything other than reheat leftovers.

From comments on this post, it sounds as though rotary dials were a feature of early microwaves that have not disappeared entirely, but may have become less popular than keypads. I find this fascinating! I think the first microwave oven we ever had in the house when I was growing up did not have a dial—and I'm not sure my grandparents ever had a microwave—so I hadn't realized it was even or ever a semi-normal feature.

Still looks like a military installation, though.

Good Decision Cat approves bringing in the Stalwart Microwave to replace the Behemoth. I am still in awe that somebody thought it was a good idea to install a toasting/heating element inside a microwave.

I am still in awe that somebody thought it was a good idea to install a toasting/heating element inside a microwave.

I know! I never figured out how that was supposed to work, but I really didn't want to find out!

(I approve of your choice of icon.)

From the dangers behind that thick brick wall

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