Dudley Do-Right's such a jerk

[sovay]

Long before I actually read or saw anything that would qualify as a traditional Victorian melodrama, I learned a thirty-second parody of the genre from my grandmother, who performed it in three voices with the aid of a napkin doubling (tripling?) for the whiplash moustache of a villain, the hair-bow of a damsel in distress, and the bowtie of a hero. The immortal dialogue ran as follows:

"I've come to collect the rent."
"I can't pay the rent!"
"I've come to collect the rent."
"I can't pay the rent!"
"I'll pay the rent!"
"My hero!"
"Curses, foiled again!"

Did anyone else's relatives ever pull this out at family dinners, or was it just me? It has the feel of a time-honored piece of shtick, but I can't remember ever running into anyone else who knew it—admittedly, I've never asked point-blank. I assume now it will turn out to be one of those things everyone gets from their grandparents at an impressionable age. Internet?

Comments

[genarti]

Yes! I learned it as "You must pay the rent!" but otherwise the same, right down to the napkin. From my mother, I believe, but I assume she learned it in childhood too.

[sovay]

but otherwise the same, right down to the napkin. From my mother, I believe, but I assume she learned it in childhood too.

Apparently in some versions the napkin is a must! I had not imagined this was quite so widespread or variable a routine. It's awesome.

(I like your icon.)