An important test for which I had waited three months and undergone an excruciatingly difficult last week of prep and an especially difficult morning was canceled on me while I was in the office, not because of anything I had done or failed to do, but either because the doctor misunderstood an answer I had given during the pre-test or because it was not a test that would ever have been safe to schedule me for at all and I don't know which because they wouldn't talk to me and in fact canceled the appointment that was supposed to follow the test even though I was right there in the waiting room requesting to speak to the doctor to sort out what the fuck had just happened.
selkie and my mother strategized end-runs afterward, but it is still actually incomprehensible to me what went wrong unless the doctor literally forgot what I was there for and wouldn't let me get enough of a word in to explain. That was the major, but not the sole incident of the day; for example, I was called early in the morning to reschedule the test to the afternoon and then again to confirm that I was coming in for it, which in hindsight is real insult to injury. I would like one thing to happen today that doesn't feel like being beaten up. I had some soft-serve ice cream, but it's not sufficient counterweight.
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- 1: If you don't want the death of the party after I'm gone, sing one for me
- 2: I want to show you all the versions of myself
- 3: Once you've gone, remains the question, baby
- 4: That gossip's eye will look too soon
- 5: I left my mind behind in 2015
- 6: Your spirit watched me up the stairs
- 7: Am I just a phantom waiting to be ripped around on shady ground?
- 8: 'Cause your eyes are the green of tornado skies
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