I think my metaphor meter has expired :D You're certainly still on high revs, given that it's 4:30 am or so....

automated bread slicer.... I think we need a meme about what appliance you not only never want, but would abhor... I think for me it would be the bread maker. The whole point of fresh bread, for me, is that you get to make it.

(I wouldn't mind a bread slicer, though)